Been together with him for 499 days.

We started our long-distance relationship in 2018.

499 days; 11976 hours; 718560 minutes.

from Kota Kemuning to Skudai, JB - 324.4 km

Tomorrow is our 500 days. I've been waited for so long till you come and visit me in KL.

It's been 2 months we did get to see each other face to face, hugs, and kisses.

-

Do we have LDR struggles? 

Hmm.. for me, I think yes, we do have the struggle.

We can't spend time together like other couple does. Spending time hanging out during weekends, movies, shopping even some special day such as Valentine's Day.

We might not be able to spend time together.

The only way to see you is from phones and video calls.

We might only get to see each other every 2 to 3 months. Or even longer if there is not any holidays or special day in between.

Every time leaving him going back to my original place, I feel so empty as just a few days ago, we can stick together 24 hours and all of a sudden he had to left. 

I knew this path that we both chose is not going to be easy and until the time we get to be with each other permanently, there will still be many goodbyes. (I cried a lot when I'm gonna leave him)

We have to go through the pain of being separated again each time our visit ends. 

Every time goodbyes, I have to take a few days even weeks to recover from this kind of worst feeling to the “normal” me.

We will have arguments even fights when we not able to meet each other.

Sometimes, I will fear of missing out, fear of not being able to be there for him, fear of the uncertainties in the future.

I'm very willing to give space to him when he wants his “me time”.

I might be annoying, keep texting him, call him to know what he is doing.

I wasn't confident about myself and feeling insecurities.

I always told myself not to keep on bothering him on what he is doing, where is he right now.

Just last Sunday, we go into a fight on I'm controlling him not to do this and that.

During the fights, I was crying and he didn't even want to comfort me. End up we end the call with unhappily.

I texted him on what I feel and what I really want to tell him actually.

Maybe he might not be able to understand me well. But he still manages to listen what I'm saying.

I believe both of us and fight those uncertainties and arguments
I hope that when we are old, we can both laugh at each other about the past and currently together.



love you to the moon and back
xoxo